Spreading a message, knowing how to listen, defusing aggression, asserting oneself ... These are the main challenges of a good professional understanding. How to raise them? Coaching recommendations in four common situations.Cécile Guéret
In the competitive world of the company, communication often aims to dominate rather than convey a message ... that nobody hears, too much preoccupied by the stress or frustration engendered by this pretended dialogue. For the exchange to be balanced, it is a matter of creating a climate of trust, rid of representations of power or submission that everyone projects on the other.
How to establish this authentic contact? "By falling masks, causing loss of identity and misunderstanding," answers Daniel Grosjean, coach and consultant in human resources. "Considering the other with kindness, so that everyone feels heard and respected, "adds Bernard Sananès, psychologist and trainer specializing in the management of stress and emotions. For to communicate well at work is to allow everyone to occupy his place in a common project. Here's how.
Intervene in a meeting
"Prepare your intervention with a positive, confident spirit, advises Daniel Grosjean, asking if it will clearly meet the expectations of your interlocutors." If everyone wants to impose his truth on the other, the argument is inevitable. Through eyes, silence and listening, show that you hear them.
Do not stand back from the circle, in an attitude of contempt or flight. Uncross your arms, stand straight, shoulders open: confident and welcoming. When it is up to you to take into account the previous contributions, measure the enrichment they bring to the common project. Do not speak loudly - confess impotence - but firmly, supporting your words with clear gestures (dry movements of the hands, especially) and assertive looks.
"To avoid being overwhelmed by stress, it is better to speak as soon as possible," says Bernard Sananès. What if you are contradicted? Use what you see from each other, for example, saying, "I feel like you do not agree." Showing that you are listening, you defuse the conflict and show the audience that you are in control of the exchange.
Submit a problem to his boss
"Above all, do not come to his office unexpectedly, you risk a reaction of rejection," warns Bernard Sananès. In a small business, you can ask for an interview informally.In a big, better to respect the procedure. All this is to make you want to be received. For this, present your problem in terms of common project and not personal dissatisfaction.
Once with your boss, show him that you are bringing a solution more than a difficulty. For example, to be increased, it is better to recall previous successes and ask to redefine its mission. And if you're intimidated? "Say it to him, be true! Unless you're dealing with a perverse personality, he will respect your vulnerability. If you hide it from him, he may be clumsy," says Daniel Grosjean.